Sense and Sensitivity
by StatsGrandma57
Summary: Ben Solo has a way out of his predicament, but he may not be willing to go along with it. Yes, I like Jane Austen.
SENSE AND SENSITIVITY

Luke met with Han, Leia and Kira in the lobby of the medical center. Kira was cheerfully squirming, adamant that Han set her down.

"Not yet," Han admonished her, cuddling his baby girl. "Not till we see Ben. So settle down, you're heavy." It never ceased to amaze Han how fast his children grew; that Ben was nearly his height was nearly incomprehensible to him. His son was well on his way to manhood, a time that was at best confusing and stressful. For Ben, that burden was ferociously increased.

If he made it that far. That thought had been a hard knot in Han's gut since the night Ben had been taken to the medcenter. He appealed to any deities that might exist that Ben would at least listen to what Luke had to say, and that might, he realized, be a long stretch. Luke and Ben were not on the best of terms.

The tension radiated off Leia as well. She was wearing her best diplomat's face, but Han knew she was suffering a mother's agony. He draped his unoccupied arm around her shoulders, and she instinctively leaned into him.

Luke, too, was hardly at ease. He was now a seasoned Jedi master, but Han and Leia were pretty certain that he'd never dreamed he'd encounter a situation such as this. Dressed in his formal black Jedi attire, he looked solemn and contained, but Leia sensed his distress. He was clearly feeling out of his depth.

Seven-Three-H met them in the waiting area. "Hello," he said in his quiet voice. "Captain Solo, I'm glad you got some rest, and Minister, I hope you did as well." He turned his photoreceptors toward Luke. "Master Skywalker, if everyone is in agreement, I would like to consult with you privately for a few minutes."

Luke studied his sister's and brother-in-law's faces. "Are you all right with this?" He asked them gently.

"Of course," Leia answered, trying to help Han keep Kira from wiggling out of their grasp.

"Have at it," Han said to him.

"See Benny!" Kira said stubbornly.

Seven-Three-H looked at the little girl. "Normally, we don't allow the little ones in the mental health areas."

"I think Ben might respond well to her. He's very despondent right now," Luke appealed to the droid.

"He is. Perhaps a visit from his sister will cheer him a bit," Seven-Three-H. "I do worry about her safety, though; this is the child he attempted to harm, is it not?"

"It is, but usually, they get along very well," Leia conceded. "I think Han and I can keep her safe."

Seven-Three-H gave his assent. "I'll speak with Master Skywalker, and you may see Ben, but if he becomes agitated-"

"He's not getting a second chance at hurting her," Han growled. He held up his younger daughter. "Ready to see Ben, sweetie?"

"Yeah!" Kira proclaimed gleefully. Han clutched her close, as if he was hanging on to her for dear life. He wasn't sure if it was her life-or his.

Tentatively, the three walked towards Ben's plasticine-encased room. He was lying on his side, motionless, staring into an abyss only he could see.

Leia gingerly approached his bed, leaned over and tenderly kissed Ben's forehead. He was unresponsive. Her heart felt like a stone in her chest.

"Benny!" Kira chimed, wriggling furiously to escape Han's grasp. At that, Ben turned his head, took one look at Kira, and burst into tears. He sat up, arms extended to receive his little sister, embracing her fervently.

"Hey, ankle biter," Ben said to her, smiling through his tears. He kissed her cheeks, which made her laugh uproariously as she flung her chubby toddler arms around his neck. The two were having a joyful reunion, as Ben murmured, "I didn't mean to hurt you, ankle biter. I'm so sorry."

"I think it's safe to say she's forgiven you," Han remarked, smiling at his son and

daughter together. He and Leia visibly relaxed as they watched the two kids interact, hoping against hope that this would make Ben more amenable to what Luke and Seven-Three-H were about to suggest.

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"Thank you for coming, Master Skywalker," Seven-Three-H said graciously to Luke. Luke sat in one of the chairs in the med droid's office, with Seven-Three-H facing him. The space was utilitarian but comfortable.

"It's Luke," Luke said genially.

"Yes, Master Luke."

Luke smiled at him, remembering his discussion with Threepio about names, so long ago. Droids could be so literal. "No, just Luke," he suggested to the droid. He'd never been comfortable being addressed as Master Skywalker; his main concession was allowing his students to call him Master Luke. Eimear felt that they should respect his training and title of Jedi Master.

"Yes," Seven-Three-H said. He came straight to the point. "We did discuss the possibility of extinguishing your nephew's Force-sensitive capabilities in our previous conversation."

Luke nodded. "It can be done. I've studied the process, and apparently, you have as well."

"Not so much studied as learned from the Jedi who went before you, may they all be one with the Force. I understand it would likely be a painful process." His metallic face seemed to express concern.

"Emotionally, very painful," Luke sighed. He leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes. He felt as if he'd aged five years in the past few days.

"His parents are insistent that the boy give consent, and I'm obligated to honor their wishes." There was a hint of mild frustration-and sadness-in Seven-Three-H's soothing tone. "He is not of the age of consent, legally, but I understand why they wish him to be an active participant."

"It will be easier if he does agree," Luke said. "It can be done without it, but that's ethically questionable in all but extreme cases." Luke frowned. "I hope it doesn't come to that with Ben."

"Agreed. Unfortunately, Ben is not the most cooperative of patients," Seven-Three-H said quietly, but without judgment. "There seems to be a very real vulnerability about him, and if he's properly treated, I think he will be a sweet and sensitive person. He's highly intelligent. Tell me, Luke, have you meditated upon this matter?"

Luke's face was solemn and not without a touch of sadness. "I have."

"And what have you seen?"

Luke sighed and shifted uncomfortably. "Obviously, the future is always in motion. But I've seen things, felt them." _And it wasn't pretty_ , he added silently. "As much as I dislike the idea of destroying sensitivity to the Force in someone, I think for Ben, it's the best choice." It was clear that the decision was hurtful to Luke; he hadn't arrived at his conclusion easily.

Seven-Three-H stated softly, "I would agree. But Minister and Captain Solo feel that the boy needs to be a willing participant. Shall we speak with the family?"

"Honestly? I think it would be better if Han and Leia discussed with him how we're planning to treat his illness first. My nephew and I, as you may have gathered, aren't on the best of terms," Luke explained.

"I see. Do you think they will?"

"They said they were going to, and I have no reason to doubt them. I'll be in the waiting area," Luke said sadly, and stood up to leave.

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Ben was reading 'The Little Lost Bantha Cub' to Kira, which amused Leia and Han no end; he'd demanded the story incessantly when he'd been Kira's age, and the couple was amused by Kira's repeated requests for the story. It made them feel as if they'd finally gotten their revenge. It was a moment to savor before the dreadful business of the day began.

"Okay, okay, that's enough for now," Ben pronounced after the last reading. "Draw me something." He handed Kira a datapad Han had brought for him, though Han had not seen him use it. Kira protested at first, but was soon snuggled against Ben, happily running her chubby fingers over the pad. Han and Leia were heartened by Ben's pleasant mood; Leia could feel calmness in her son, something she had not felt in a long time.

 _That was all about to change,_ she thought as she felt her insides clench. She looked over at Han, who looked as if he had heartburn-or a broken heart. The last days had taken a toll on him. Yes, he'd rested, but it would be a long time before he didn't ache for his son. Leia knew that feeling all too well.

"Ben," Leia said quietly, "your dad and I need to talk to you about something."

Ben's eyes darkened with suspicion and his expression soured; he clutched his little sister close, as if she was a life raft. "What?" he demanded, his voice losing its good humor and tenderness, cutting through the room's sterile air like a knife.

"Take it easy, son, just hear us out," Han urged. "We're trying to help you."

"Yeah, right!" Ben snapped. "That's why I'm still locked up in this horrible place!" He was trying to look tough, but tears filled his eyes. "I hate it here! I want to go home." He wiped the tears back, but he couldn't stop them.

"Don' cry, Benny," Kira said, brushing his face. "Don' cry."

Ben hugged her hard. She cooed at her older brother, her soft toddler face filled with concern.

"Ben, we want you to come home, too," Leia said gently. "But what's gone on has to stop before you can."

"Son, you nearly killed your little sister," Han said, laying a hand on Ben's shoulder. Ben jerked it away.

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"I didn't mean to!" Ben protested. "I don't know what came over me!"

"We know that," Han went on. "And that's the point. You don't know what came over you, and you couldn't control it." Tears still streamed from Ben's eyes.

"So what're you gonna do, keep me here forever?" Ben demanded angrily.

"No, Ben, we're not," Han told him. "But you're going to have to make some very difficult decisions if you're going to live with us."

"What kind of decisions?" Ben choked through his tears. Kira kissed his cheek. Ben still clung to her.

"Ben, honey," Leia said tenderly, "you have something called bipolar disorder, and with your strong Force-sensitivity, it's not a good mix."

"Tell me something I couldn't figure out for myself," Ben sobbed bitterly.

Leia shifted uncomfortably. She longed to reach out and wrap her arms around her suffering son, and she could feel Han wanting to do the same, but she refrained. "Your bipolar disorder can be controlled, but not cured. Your Force sensitivity makes controlling it very difficult."

Ben's eyes, still swollen from crying, glared at his parents with a look that was deadly in its maliciousness. "So you're not gonna let me come home, are you? You lied!"

"Ben, your mother and I aren't done talking, so for once in your life, let us finish up," Han said, his voice firm-and unnervingly quiet.

Ben knew that expression; Dad was deadly serious. It was his father at his most dangerous. Han yelling was far less lethal than when he was quiet. Even Kira knew the look and turned rapt attention to Dad.

"So say something!" Ben said, his mouth set in a hard line.

"Ben, you're going to have to make a difficult choice," Leia said, shooting a harsh look over her shoulder at Han, before turning back to her son.

Han had seen that expression often enough to have no doubt as to its meaning: Shut up before I kill you. Right now, he knew his wife was right.

"Your Force sensitivity is going to make your illness unmanageable. You'll be unresponsive to treatment, and you'll be a danger to yourself and others, like what happened with your sister." Her voice was gentle, but she wasn't mincing words. "There's a strong possibility that removing your Force sensitivity will improve your life." She winced, hard. Han put a hand on her shoulder.

Shock blanketed Ben's face. "What are you talking about?" he cried out. "You can't destroy the Force in someone!" His anger was rising.

"Actually, son, it can be done," Han replied, his voice gentle. "We've consulted with the experts."

"What 'experts'?" Ben spat. "There aren't any experts!"

"Your medic, Seven-Three-H, lived and worked among the Jedi during the time of the Clone Wars," Leia explained. "And your aunt and uncle have done extensive research."

"I hate my uncle!" Ben shouted angrily. "He made me like this!"

Frightened, Kira scooted away from her brother. Han picked her up and hugged her small form close to him.

Han and Leia looked at each other wordlessly over the top of Kira's head. Not only was Ben irrational, and ill—and suffering because of it—he was also a teenager, which was its own psychosis. Ben couldn't look into the future; hells, he couldn't see into next week.

Leia decided it was time to try an experiment. "Han, please take Kira out of the room."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Han said, but Leia held up her hand.

"Han, just do it!" Leia ordered him.

While Han did enjoying sparring with Leia at times, this was, he told himself, not the time to engage in it.He left the room, toting a now-crying and protesting Kira along with him.

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Han carried Kira into the waiting area, where Luke appeared lost in meditation. However, Luke wasn't deep enough not to notice the arrival of his brother-in-law and niece. Kira squirmed out of her father's arms and ran happily to her uncle.

"Hey, sweetie," Luke said, pulling her into his lap and hugging her. Kira hugged him back, then bounced down to the floor; being a toddler, her energy had been suppressed long enough. The little girl ran from one end of the room to the other, squealing with delight. Han figured that as long as she didn't kill herself or destroy the place, it was a good thing.

"I think she needs to blow off some steam," Han commented wryly.

"Looks like he's not the only one," Luke commented, smiling sadly, noting his old friend's tension. "It's rough going, isn't it?"

Han rolled his eyes. "You have no idea."

"He's a teenager, which makes it all the more difficult," Luke agreed.

"I'm thinking maybe Jana and Kira can stay small forever. Or go straight to adulthood," Han mused.

"You know, they'll still discover the opposite sex," Luke warned, laughing.

"Not my daughters!" Han protested, which only made Luke chuckle more. He narrowed his eyes at Luke. "What? Are you looking forward to Rey discovering boys?"

Luke smiled. "She's interested in other things."

"She's eight, kid, just wait till she's a teenager. I'm not looking forward to Jana becoming one, especially after dealing with her brother." Han stopped pacing and flopped into a chair. The day was still young and he was inexplicably exhausted. He swept his hand over his forehead, pushing his hair back and shutting his eyes.

"You okay?" Luke asked softly.

"Hells no, I'm not okay," Han said, but with far less force than Luke normally expected from his normally vociferous brother-in-law and dear friend. He then opened his amber-green eyes and looked directly at Luke. "I don't know what we're gonna do if we don't get Ben to agree to..."

"We don't need his consent," Luke said softly, his voice tinged with sadness.

"Yeah, you don't, but I'd rather he agree to this. We can't take everything from him," Han remarked, feeling a headache rising up from his neck into his head. It was starting to throb mercilessly. He rubbed the back of his neck, hoping in vain for relief. He was reasonably certain it wouldn't be forthcoming.

"You're trying to give him his life back," Luke pointed out.

"Yeah, and if we take something that belongs to him, he's gonna hate us for the rest of our lives. I mean, he might still hate us for the rest of our lives, but I think something this big has to be something he'll go along with," Han argued "I know how I feel about being told what to do."

Luke had to chuckle. "I think we're all sort of aware of that. But you are his parents. He's not of majority. What are you going to do if he doesn't agree to the process?"

Han sighed and looked utterly defeated. "I have absolutely no idea."

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Leia's diplomatic skills were getting an unwelcome workout. Talking to her son about his illness and the possibility of extinguishing his Force capabilities was far more difficult than she'd anticipated. Bringing together factions that had warred with each other for centuries had been an easier task than this.

"Ben, bipolar disorder is, by definition, mood swings that can't be controlled by will alone," Leia was trying to explain, keeping her voice neutral as she'd been so well trained to do. "You're a strong-willed person; if anyone could do it by sheer determination, you could."

Ben's face was dark with fury. "Why don't you stop pretending like I'm one of your high and mighty whatevers that you're always trying to cut a deal with! That's all you care about, anyway!"

Guilt bit into Leia with the power of a venomous snake. Yes, she had been away far too often when Ben was small. Yes, her work had demanded too much of her. She'd gotten much better at setting limits on her time as she grew older, more experienced, and had a second child. She understood that bipolar disorder was an electrochemical imbalance that had nothing to do with her parenting.

And yet, it stung. Hard.

Still, this was not the time to break down. She needed to be resolute, but she also needed to let her firstborn—her only son—know that she loved him, supported him, and wanted a good life for him.

Leia wasn't sure that was something she could accomplish at the moment-if ever.

"Ben, honey, I love you very much," Leia began, but Ben interrupted her.

"No, you don't! You love Jana and Kira! You don't need me!" Ben was sobbing. Never had Leia seen him so angry-or so lost.

"Ben, you're as much a part of the family as any of us, and what we want most for you is a life that gives you satisfaction and joy. I honestly don't think that's possible if you retain your Force capabilities."

Ben was still crying, but the predominant look on his face was one of shock. For a few moments, both he and his mother were silent, tears still falling from the boy's eyes, but slowing.

An idea formed in Leia's mind, but she needed to weigh it very carefully. It had the potential to go very, very wrong-but it also might be what could save her beloved son. It was a radical one, and Han would think she'd lost her mind.

But desperate times called for desperate measures, and Leia was as desperate as she'd ever been, and whether Ben was aware of it or not, he was, too.

"You've said you talk to your grandfather via the Force," Leia said, keeping her tone level. Anakin Skywalker was the last person she wanted Ben to communicate with, but she was aware that he'd done so, or at least had tried to.

"Well, sometimes," Ben admitted. "But all he ever says is, don't do what I did. Which he never explains. It's like, yeah, he went to the Dark Side, but at least he had power. So I don't get it."

Leia knew she had to tread carefully here. "Yes, he had power, but only the power to destroy, and that destroyed him. He died as Anakin Skywalker, which was what saved him. In the end, his incredible Force powers couldn't help him."

"He was powerful, though. Uncle Luke said he was once a powerful Jedi," Ben snorted. "If he was so powerful, then what the fuck happened?"

"He hungered for more and more power, and he lacked patience. He was always angry. He turned on his friend and mentor, and ended up falling into the pits of fire, living as a burned out husk under his black armor," Leia explained to him.

Ben eyed her with suspicion. "Uncle Luke thinks he's some great hero."

"Uncle Luke is far more forgiving than I am," Leia informed her son."Your grandfather committed terrible acts, and some of those involved his children. Five minutes of penance at the end of our biological father's life was enough for Luke. It was never enough for me, and it never will be." She had to be careful to modulate her voice. "He was, I believe, afflicted as you are." Leia had never considered it before, but now that she had, it made sense.

Ben became angry. "You're lying to me! You're just saying these things because you want to kill off the Force in me! You want me dead!"

"Ben, if you keep going this way, you will be dead," Leia said coolly. "And I don't want a dead son."

"You're such a liar! You don't care at all what happens to me!" Ben shouted at her. "Get out. I hate you!"

"Maybe you should try getting in touch with your namesake," Leia said gently.

"Ben Kenobi? That loser? Are you serious? What the hells could he do to help me?" Ben was ready to jump and attack her, but Leia held up a warning hand.

"Just try it," Leia said quietly, trying to process her own feelings-and Ben's. It was going to take a while.

"Just leave!" Ben snarled at her.

Wordlessly, Leia left the room, her eyes burning from the tears she was desperately trying not to spill. And yet, she could sense, despite her son's fury, how very much he longed to be free of his demons.

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Leia wandered to the waiting area, where both Luke and Han were focusing on Kira, who was giggling and racing back and forth. Han had once said that toddlers were the ultimate weapons of mass destruction, and Leia had to agree. It was a pleasure to see her youngest so completely enjoying herself.

Han, sitting slouched in a chair that was far too small for his large frame, his legs extended, looked up at his wife.

"Let me guess: that didn't go well," Han said to her, his eyes meeting hers.

Leia groaned. "Not exactly." She slumped on the sofa across from Han. Luke had been sitting there but was now chasing his niece. She massaged her temples, but then opened her eyes. Han studied her carefully.

"He's not going to agree to it, is he?" Han asked unhappily.

Leia gave him a meaningful look. "Yes. Yes, he is. Just not today."


End file.
